insideout

I feel like I'm swelling up inside. I feel like I'm overflowing with pain and sorrow. I'm hurting. Suffocating in air. I feel like someone ripped my heart out and left me to die. Slow and painfully. This day has sucked. Both in ED world -and in the real one. I ate too much. Drank too little. Cried and sopped. School is killing me. Homework mostly but even to be in that darn classroom is agonizing.

Listening to the cardigans “And Then You Kissed Me”. Wonderful song. YouTube it. Seriously.

You're a nightmare beating the dawn...

I feel……………. Nothing. Empty and full. And empty again. I fill the hole in my heart with food. And then I purged it -‘cause that’s easier than dealing with all the concealed pain. Upside down, an’ inside out. Killing me softly. Not really. Killing me gradually. That’s more fitting. (Who’s killing you?) Well I’ll tell you, voice in my head, everything and nothing at all.

Sorry I’m tired and I just felt like… Writing.

Night<3