Life gives me lemons

... At the moment.

So listen to my terrific morning -she said. Her voice thick with sarcasm.
Lately I'm having trouble sleeping, so I when to bed at like 4.23 pm or whatever, and was planning to get up at 6 so I could get ready for school. I wake up and snooze the darn thing. I just felt so tired. Fell lightly asleep (the kinda sleep you know you goanna wake up from soon) and after a while I woke to check the time -it suddenly felt like a lot of snoozing! I look at the timer and it is passed 8!! FUCK! I think to myself "fuck it anyway, I need sleep to function..." Even though I feel a small spike of guild in the pit of my stomach I close my eyes.

So I fall asleep for the last time, and my mom (god bless her by the way) asks me why I’m not getting ready for school. I yell at her and say that it's too late! I overslept! Game over! She looks at me and sighs... No? It's like 7.30?

(Confused that I can mistake an entire hour? Well winter time is upon us… So I sat my clock an hour forward… Unfortunately my clever high-tech phone already did that -all by it self, so when my alarm when off… IT WAS FUCKING FIVE IN THE FUCKING MORNING! No wonder I was so tired? I only slept 30 minutes!!!!)

My reaction must have been priceless. "WHAT!?" In that word I fall out of the bed -face first.

Never the less I get dressed like a tornado. Got some basic make up on and zipped my new boots. I was on my way.

I asked my step-dad if I could borrow his bike ('cause my mom's bike is stolen and mine is.. Well.. Not here.) He said "sure." I said "great"...

Ran down to fetch the bike from the basement (which it's quite hard with 6 inch stilettos) got the stupid bike and I was READY! Still 10 minutes on the clock -I could just make it!

But here's the thing; my step-dad's bike is a man-bike. You cannot, I repeat, YOU CANNOT go on board on this bike like a lady. You have to swing your god damn leg backwards like a russian ballerina to even get on that crap ass bike!!! Shit! But I managed...

Hard parts over… Right? WONG! Even with my highest shoes I can't reach the fucking ground... I try to break. I can't. I panic. The bike is rolling on to the road. FEAR! Ice cold fear strikes me. I try to get off. Can't. Falling.

So I fell. With my new shoes. They are so messed up now! How am I EVER goanna get them clean!??!?! Scratches everywhere!!!

Oh... And by the way. I broke my foot in the process. Jep… Fucking BROKE my god damn foot...

Fucking fantastic. Life gives me lemons an' I suck RIGHT into them!!!

Ouch...

Ah, to be honest I haven’t seen the doctor yet but my mom says it might be worse than it look. I don’t hope so… Otherwise I can’t wear my new boots!!

Just for the record -my mom is an angel. When she saw me in the doorway with black mascara smudged around my tear-filled eyes and holding my left boot in the hand, all she did was help me in and stroke my hair… While I cried my eyes out over nothing.

And I don't cry so often...

I don’t know… I just feel extremely delicate at the moment. Like all my skin is burned off and left my nerves exposed. Everything gets to me. EVERYTHING! My mom ran down to 7-11 and got me a magazine, some coke zero and diet candy… = Angel.

Love Cille